Data Circle

Posted by Jimmy on UNaXcess 2 (message ID 1426583 until it expires).

“Here is a list depicting various types of ‘computer girl’:

Hard disk girl
She remembers everything, FOREVER.

RAM girl
She forgets about you, the moment you turn her off.

Windows girl
Everyone knows that she can’t do anything right, but no one can live without her.

Screensaver girl
She is good for nothing but at least she is fun.

Internet girl
Difficult to access.

Server girl
Always busy when you need her.

Multimedia girl
She makes horrible things look beautiful.

CD-Rom girl
She is always faster and faster.

E-mail girl
Every ten things she says, eight are nonsense.

Virus girl
Also known as “wife” – when you are not expecting her, she comes, installs herself and uses all your resources. If you try to uninstall her you will lose something, if you don’t try to uninstall her you will lose everything.

USB girl
They like it in every slot.

Broadband girl
Enjoys a fat pipe, but every time you try to use it she gets all coy and caps your usage.

The SLI girl
Has an identical twin sister but, when you get hold of it, it’s slightly disappointing.

The Linux girl
She’ll let you do anything so long as you make available a full video copy of the action.

The Firewall girl
Overly protective and doesn’t like you playing games.

Pure genuis, couldn’t stop laughing when I read it. Here’s some I came up with, though perhaps not as funny:

Perl girl
Insists on each date being different and on communicating in sentences that are as short as possible. Easy to make mistakes that don’t manifest themselves until later, but if you push hard enough she’ll point out exactly where you’re going wrong.

PHP girl
Very inconsistent, and will change her mind about what is the best way to do things every five minutes, resulting in all your previous ideas for dates suddenly failing to get her attention.

Assembly girl
Likes you to move as fast as possible, but can only date one particular type of guy.

ADSL girl
Likes her guys to live nearby, flat out refuses to do long distance relationships. Will always ask for your phone number before agreeing to go on a date.

Cable girl
Lots of fast action, providing you don’t mind her dating every other guy on the street at the same time.

Blog girl
Will insist on boring you to tears with every little detail of what happened to her in the last week and will be dump you if you don’t reply to every single point.